You might be a homeowner if…

1. The sound of dripping water somewhere in the house elicits the same emotional response as hearing gunshots in your neighbourhood.

2. A dry October weekend in the forecast makes you happy…because it means your weekly leaf-raking won’t be as back-breaking.

3. You find zen in a well-plastered wall.

4. Your annual vacation budget just went to the roofer.

5. You find yourself with front-door envy during your evening walk.

6. You’ll forego a lunch date that’s been planned for two months to wait for the air conditioner repairman for ac repairs or new ac system installation.

7. You often wish you had married a handyman…or were related to one.

8. The sight of an ant in your house initiates a National Geographic-worthy scientific study into its origins and potential eradication.

9. A quick trip to the hardware store means 2.5 hours and at least $200.

10. You really don’t mind owing hundreds of thousands of dollars to a bank because…it’s yours!